thanksgiving night.

so i have not blogged in a while due to lack of access to the internet.

but i got it tonight and im glad there is alot on my mind

due to the day of course!

so i guess for tradition i'll start by saying how thankful i am for my life!

im very blessed as we all are in america

so first of all and mostly thankful for our amazing brave service men.

they are truly amazin and have all my thanks and my thoughts they are able to come home to theirs familes soon if they are over seas and for the ones home i hope they get to be with their loved ones and kick back a few breers they deserve it!

so thank you to all our millitary men and women!

my true heros for sure!

next to my friends who have really turned into my famlies

sarah chelsea fiorella hannah gracie marion my boys and cj.

thank you for always "having my back" and always being there you all have truly changed my life and done things i can never thank you for!

i love you all so much!

and my real family of course!

my mom this really im very thankful for!

thank you for all the help mother!

even threw the "disagreements" i know i always have you thank you i love you!

and i really enjoy working with you!

which brings me into the next one my job!!!!

its really a blessing to have my job its  a great learning exsperince for me and am very blessed to be able to enjoy and have passion while working.

thats not something we get everyday! so im very thankful for it!

well i really could go on forever and ever but those are some big ones!

so next today has really just made me think about everything in my life as it should,

and i really just want to say that this past year has been the best year in my life!

so many things have happened and some how i always came up swinging.

this year i think i have really started the foundation to a life full of happiness and a life that i can be proud of.

i have found strength inside me to do things i have dreamed about.

i have found who i want to be and am working everyday.

i think this year most of all i found peace.

which is a new thing.

i have learned its time to mourn the loss and to except the new with a full heart.

and man does it feel good.

not everything is in your power but the things that are its today that it needs to be changed.

and the things out of your control, you must see the glass half full and embrace it with a smile on your face and heart.

because nothing is worth letting you from being you and being who you want to be.

anyways im geting tierd so i'll shut up! =]

love it!

" People come in your life for a reason, a season, or a life time "

November 15, 2010

I am ready to stop mouring the past.

I'm ready to know my failures.

I am ready to excepect

and

I'm ready to let go.

I know the future is here.

But most of all today is here.

And I will live for today and know my past

I will feel the hurt and mend

it with smiles and an open heart that today will bring.



i think

the best part of it all
is not really knowing a dang thing about you
but feeling like i know you inside out
i know nothing about your past
but i know you now.
i'm worried i wont know your future
but its not worth knowing your day
its feeling like you dont know me at all
you dont even know where my heart is
you dont know who i can be
mostly who i want
and you too just want to know me today.
i think the best thing about it is jumping blind
open hearted because its something you cannot close
anymore.
i think the best part about it, is i dont care as long as you don't.

and hunney i'm JUMPING!

love is looking in their eyes and forgetting every fault you both hold.

love is perfection in the choas.

love is sitting in silence

but never having a quite moment

love is strong.

love is laying in their arms.

love is a high.

love is never feeling a thing.

love is weak.

love is letting it go.

love is opening up.

love is friendship.

love is not caring what has happened before.

love is breakfast in bed

that proceeds to dinner on the couch.

love is knowing every risk and jumping!

just keep quite and count the cards

" So many things i'd tell you if i were able.

but i just keep quite and count the cards that pass by"

i just want to change the world

is that too much to ask?

hahaha.

i believe in passion in everything you do.

because it makes life worth living.

i believe in smiling to everyone.

because it can change anyones day.

i believe in working hard.

because you need to get your dreams.

i believe in following your heart.

because you need what it says.

i believe in the risk.

because the fall is nothing compared to never feeling

the wind on your face.

most of all i belive in love.

because its the only thing in the world that makes life make sense.

because it is what keeps you sane.

because it drives you crazy.

because it brings you hope.

because it brings your heartbreak

because it will one day change the world.

but most of all one day it will change me and my life.



i want to share my passion for people and my passion for life, to change peoples lives.

i want to do it one person at a time.

i want to make the simple things big things.

by stopping on the side of the road to help someone.

by being the friend i would want.

by being the smiling face you see everyday.

by listening.

i just want to show people there is still hope

and life really is beautiful regaurdless of what society does.

life is your choice and the glass is half full.

i think i want too much, but im not scared!

i have a lifetime to do it.

and i will live it out everyday!

=]

November 11, 2010

There comes a point in your life when you will realize that being truley happy is no longer listening to what they say. what you have to do rather, is go where your heart tells you, its where you take the risk and jump. There comes a point in your life where what they say no longer matters because the fall, the flying sensation has become far greater than anything they could ever tell you to do, that point is one when they wont speak, because they do not know. Because where you have landed has become a greater sccess than they ever imagined you to be.

November 9, 2010

Tonight i'm for sure streessed!

i have these dreams and i am ready to work for them

and soooo ready to get them!

wwhyyy can't it be free?

hahaha. its horrible how in order to make money you must spend it!

i wish i had saved my money since i was like 2 so i could

pay for schooling!

haha. life would be grand then!

i'm deff starting college funds for my kids

as soon as they are born so they can get the dreams!

but for me now, work and pray it works out! haha. =]

Dear Future Husband,

I hate mornings.

I'm sorry for whoever gets to deal with it!

hahaha. pray you have a job

that makes you get up and leave before me! =]

i honestly wake up angry about nothing EVERYDAY!

but if this is not the case words of wisdom...

i love coffee or coke to start my day off

with food... not breakfast food.

some favorites,

hotdogs, pb&j, tacos.

i wont talk and if i do its because im yelling.

just turn on music and let me do my thing

i guess this is to future room mates.

hahaha

November 8, 2010

One thing i don't think i'll ever understand is what "love"

suposed to be.

Because in my short life i have already found

2000 differnent kinds.

There is a love of your family.

Then a love for you closest sister or brother.

A love for your best friends.

A love of your friends.

A love that you would literally put your entire life

in a trash bag to follow one person

for the rest of your life!

Like head over heals just want to be there-love.

The kind you think you"ll honest to god die without!

Then a love where you just want to fall

asleep next to a person forever the one that makes

you safe. But if they leave you"ll cry and

be hurt but thats all.

You know you can still wake up the next day.

Love for the kid in the back of your class

but you will never talk to.

A love for the first boy who said he loves you.

A love for the old man who talked to you

about how you need to live your life in the line at the grocry store.

A love for your best friend you were raised with

and who you would call crying at 3 am

but you can never say

i swear i will marry you.

Love for the man who has chased you for a year

but you never knew was really there

until he leaves.

Love for a guy you met one summer told your life to

spent your days together then

never talked again.

Love for your big brothers best friend

Love for your favorite actor.

Anyways i could go on and on and on

see we all say love too much

but yet never say it enough!

and when you do use it everyone tells you its not love

your young and dumb

just wait till the REAL thing comes and knocks you in the ass.

well what if all these are love?

or none of them?

what is the real thing and who is to say?

how can ONE word describe all these emotions?

or how can ONE word be used wrong to cover all these emotions?

what am i waiting for?

or what am i missing out on by waiting to be knocked in the ass?